PART TWELVE – Troublous Times  to Satan’s Second Expulsion (cont.)

 

Particle – Gluttony’s Ugly Head Resurfaces

We are involved in constant warfare with the lusts of our flesh. That is why the apostle Paul said:

“But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway” (1 Corinthians 9:27 KJV).

Marilyn told me James had more than once commented on how much Mark and Trevor eat, so I called the farm and talked to Lois, who, after all, was the one who nurtured them in gluttony since childhood. I sent them this message:

Trevor, it is not without particularly good reason that the Lord has now brought you to vomit your food and give you diarrhea to rebuke you. I hope that you and Mark will take solemn heed. We’ve spoken of this many times, haven’t we? And the Lord has used James to bear a second witness this time. Remember, God IS finished winking, and none of us is exempt. How can we be? And those that know better will receive the greater judgment.

“The Word that came by Marilyn when we prayed for James was, ‘His faith will be a rebuke to others.”

Trevor responded:

“Hi All:

While recovering this morning in bed from my indigestion or whatever it was, I was praying and feeling that the cause of my sudden illness was taking too much last night at supper. I was thankful for James and his observations and asked the Lord to help change this, which is what I felt He is doing through these circumstances. Once my nausea was gone this morning, I felt good and cleaned out like after having had a 3-day fast. I believe things will be different because it is the Lord’s will and He is dealing with it through this. I told Mom what came to me when she talked to me after I got up.

Trevor”

Then Mark:

“I also accept James’ observation and the correction in it, solemnly. I know how good it feels to eat in moderation and balance, physically, mentally, and spiritually, and desire to do what is right in this matter. Praise the Lord, I thank you for your rebuke and guidance.

Mark”

Editor’s Note in 2016: The Bensons never did change. Talkers, if that, but never doers.

Note in 2018: They continued as the gluttons they were from the start.

Particle – A Letter to Jonathan

I wrote a letter to Jonathan today (he headed out yesterday to visit Samantha Underhill in Barrhead, AB for two weeks – her mother drove here and picked him up):

“Hi, son,

“As I go over my 1998 journal while writing my autobiography, I found recorded instances of wisdom the Lord gave you to encourage me, even rebuke me in kind, patient ways. I found more prophecies the Lord gave you, some of which I am putting in the autobiography (can’t include everything), along with several visions.

“It was so good that the Lord should minister to us by you. He gave you wonderful, remarkable wisdom and understanding. And though you don’t seem to show an interest in the things of God right now, I still see where the Lord gives you understanding and keeps you in so many subtle ways. There’s no pretense with you; you are what you are, and you do not, and need not, apologize for the way you are.

“I see so many good things, strengths, and qualities you have that I never had as a child or even now. I don’t speak of physical things like computers, Ninjutsu, trampolines, toys, and such, but of the emotional, mental, and spiritual gifts.

“Jonathan, you are greatly blessed. God has given you great favor. I’m so sorry you had to suffer the things you did, the trauma of your mother and father fighting daily, for hours on end, while God took us through the purification fires, which many didn’t survive. I’m sorry, son. But you were there to help us through our turmoil and grief.

“If there’s any consolation, it seems the Lord was taking you through those hardships early in life to prepare you for the purpose in store for you – not an easy one, not a common one. Rather, it’s an extraordinary purpose and a fruitful one. For those kinds of things, one must first endure hardship, even as in Ninjutsu. You don’t get your belts being slack or careless; you know that.

“Jesus said, ‘Many are called but few are chosen.’ Of those chosen, how many are faithful to the end? Your instructors at the dojo, Tom, Jim, and Wayne will tell you how many make it. It’s the same in everything. By His grace and His grace alone, son, I believe you will be faithful; you will fulfill God’s purpose for your life.

“I long for the day when you are again anointed with the Spirit of God and will minister to His saints, to us, and be a witness of God and His will to the whole earth. We all await God’s direction and work through you toward us.

“God has given you that which has blessed us immensely and we pray He will again see fit to give it to you. May He soften your heart toward Him, all the while keeping you clean of religion or religious conduct and notions that only serve to obscure reality and make one an unproductive counterfeit of the real thing.

“Even now, son, you’re real in a way, without the ‘spiritual’ or
‘Christian’ language and activity and I haven’t been altogether blind to it, as you can see by my remarks. As you are, you’re teaching me, though you may not know it, and by God’s grace alone can I appreciate it.

I recall a day at the farm when you were asking certain questions, along the ‘Why’ lines, or ‘Isn’t it true?’ kind of thinking. I seemed to feel that you were a bit rebellious, disrespectful, or on the offensive and I reacted somewhat as though you were trying to be smart with me, and Aunt Lois was nervously laughing. I think you took it that we were attacking or ganging up on you. That was not the case, and if it was, without our realizing it, then I ask that the Lord bless, heal, and cleanse you, for your sake, the Lord’s sake, and all our sakes. Please accept my apology and find it in you before God to forgive us for any ignorance and trespass against you.

“I know that I love you and desire the best for you. The questions you had were valid and good questions, though I don’t recall them, and I should have conducted myself more sensitively and empathetically with you. We could have learned from you – to think, and not to merely parrot things we have all thought or knew to be true, without assuming there was no further need of developing those things.

“I think you can take us further, Jonathan, and I long to go further with you. I failed, son, and for that, I am so sorry. I grant you full freedom, as much as I am able, to teach us and to give us what God would give us by you.

“So many times and in so many ways, I have failed you, though never once intentionally so. I believe it’s God’s will all this happened, to show you that you can never put your trust in any person, Christian or otherwise, male or female, religious or otherwise, young or old, relative or stranger, rich or poor, loving or hateful, great or small, skilled/educated/trained or otherwise.

“Your confidence must be found squarely in God, or you’ll be disappointed and disillusioned.

“Man cannot live perfection. Every one of us fails, sooner or later. So, if my failing you causes you to put your trust in the Lord, Jonathan, ironically, my failure is the best thing I could ever have done for you. With true faith in God, you can do anything of any value or importance in His sight. You can do the impossible, and the impossible you will do, you wait and see; mark my words. Love God, son, love God.

“Yes, you are a man of few words and I am with perhaps another weakness, one of many words, but I believe there is some value to what I say to you now. I hope you’ll appreciate that. Lord willing, you’ll understand, as He has given you to understand in so many things. I’m sure you’ll be given the wisdom to identify the shortfalls in this letter, too. If there are any, and you recognize them, please feel free to point them out, not only for the subject’s sake but also for ours.

“Ask your questions; don’t be afraid to express yourself with me. I wish I could remember the questions you asked because there were things we needed to consider, to ponder so that we might come to a greater, more fruitful understanding. Lord willing, He will be merciful and revisit us with these matters and so many others.

“God’s grace be with you, son, and it is. I bless you in the Name of Jesus Christ.

Dad”

Particle – The Path of Truth and Harvest Haven

I have often thought I would rather not identify The Path of Truth spiritual website with our Harvest Haven business site for two reasons – one good and one bad. The bad reason is that I wouldn’t want people to stop doing business at Harvest Haven because they were offended by spiritual truth. But isn’t that serving mammon rather than God? Isn’t that denying the Lord Jesus Christ?

The presumably good reason is that people would not be left with the impression that we were using God to prosper financially. That’s how I thought until I was surprised to find someone reverse that thinking against me. Jim Barngrover of Helena evilly surmised that we were using Harvest Haven as a front to dupe people into our religious faith!

I concluded, “Our enemies will fault us no matter what we do, so let’s just do what we gotta do.” On December 20, 2007, we discussed this matter and decided we would bare our collective soul and openly, unapologetically link the two websites to one another.

Particle – Three Hundred and Thirty-Three Days

This Sabbath morning of December 29, 2007, I awoke, and my clock said 3:33 AM. Not tired by 4 AM, I began to read. For some reason, while reading Golda Meir’s autobiography, I counted the number of days in the year when the UN passed a resolution giving the go-ahead for land for the Jews. The day was November 29, 1947. That happens to be the 333rd day of the year!

Would the UN plan it that way? Highly unlikely. It is the act of God; the number “three,” especially tripled, speaks of the Divine or Heavenly witness.

Now, why did the Lord wake me at that time and give me that revelation? I don’t know, except that again, there were two witnesses, signifying it was of God that I received this. It so happens that it was the Sabbath on that day in 1947 as well.

Who says there is no God?

Edit, August 1, 2022: Notice that each of the 2 events was on the 29th of the month, and for what it’s worth (little, it seems), exactly 60 years and 1 month apart.

Particle – The ROM Machine

On Monday, May 21 of this year, I wrote: “Investigating the ROM machine – rather fascinating – 4 min./day complete exercise.”

As of December 31, 2007, a refurbished ROM machine is ordered and will soon be on its way to Calgary where we will be picking it up, Lord willing, and bringing it to Moon River. Marilyn has been against it but Paul for it. He and I expect good things from it.
Who is right? Who is wrong? Paul and Marilyn have been both right and wrong and I’ve learned I’m not to trust them. When it comes down to it, how should I trust any person besides God? Because of the great expense of this purchase, I asked the Lord about it, had peace, and went for it.

Editor’s Note, January 2018: I don’t recall asking the Lord or receiving an answer. I believe I acted hastily and greedily, not wanting Bonny Kam (nee, Johnson) to get one before me, a very selfish move; it “serves me right.”

However, it has been a remarkable piece of exercise equipment that serves to give one an excellent workout in 4 minutes when one doesn’t have more time. That way, one can stay in shape even when pressed for time, provided they’re at the location of the ROM, like at home – it is by no means a portable unit.

Particle – 2007 Event Mentions

US/World:

– Pakistan’s Benazir Bhutto was assassinated on Dec. 27, in an ongoing political turmoil in Pakistan.

– Kenya erupted in violence over elections, on Dec. 27.

– Israel bombed a site in Syria, considered to be a nuclear facility under construction with help from North Korea.

– More signs of deteriorating freedoms of speech and religion – Muslims sued Ezra Levant’s Western Standard, bringing it down. That’s the second time for the conservative magazine to fold; the first was with Ted and Link Byfield (father and son). Also, there have been more conflicts with political homosexuals.

Harvest Haven:

– Trevor & Ingrid married in the summer. We had an outdoor reception for them on the back lawn of the main house at Harvest Haven. A justice of the peace was out to pronounce them legally man and wife. Some neighbors and customers were invited, perhaps 50-60 people.

– Elisha Rasmussen was offended over a misunderstanding Mark caused. As a result, she asked that the Harvest Haven sign at her corner be taken down. We put it across the road, and it is better there.

– Mark, Paul, and I attended the Grander conference in Taos, New Mexico.

Thankfully, I met Rebecca Hart-Malter of New York, a savant at the conference. I had an inflamed knee troubling me for months. She diagnosed it and promptly suggested high-quality silica, boron, and colloidal copper. It soon began to recover; it took a few months, but it worked.

– Paul, Mark, Ingrid, and Mariko attended a MediSCEN Healing Fusion conference in Niagra Falls, Ontario.

– We broke off another president in Hsin Ten Enterprises – Karen Foster. We now have her and Marilyn as presidents in my downline. We’re working on Lois for a third.

– A new store building was conceived and given the go-ahead by the Lord.

Particle – Miscellaneous Notable, Sad, and Serious Matters

– We severed relations with Marilyn’s stepfather and mother, Les and Laura Klein after he refused us as guests in his home because I tried to reason with their troubled and lost son, Tibby, about directions in his life. I did this in the parents’ presence.

Tibador was deteriorating before our eyes. It was sad. It troubled me to see him that way and I’m told Tibby’s father Les despised me for trying to help him. But what a relief to be dismissed, to turn away, and go on with life apart from them once again! I didn’t realize how unpleasant it was being with them until this parting – unpleasant for me and them.

– Ron and Barb Hrehirchuk lost their son Ron Junior to some mysterious disease in the brain, possibly fungal. Death was preceded by a coma for months. I had an affection for Ronnie but was never to enjoy having a relationship with him.

– I had talks with Hazel Chute that exposed her as being a fence sitter, speaking of faith but having no fruit. All talk. “Substitutions He won’t have; those are not the things He wants…” as the song His Yoke Is Easy goes.

– On the internet, we found Les Wheeldon – a young fellow Marilyn and I met in England in 1975 during the Operation Mobilization trip. We confronted him on his fake faith. Interestingly, we witnessed that others in Eastern Europe were doing the same. Les evaded us.

– Kurt MacPherson skipped the year 2007 for rockwork on our house. I heard the Lord say in 2006 when he would return: “Not this year or the next, but the year after.” The Lord’s Word was fulfilled exactly so.

Who says there is no God?

– Paul and Sara called and talked to Kerri Hartman shortly after her gall bladder was removed. I wrote her several letters confronting her on her sins and spiritual stance against us. Kerri said we were “beating a dead horse.” She expressed anxiety about their bills, saying if we wanted to help, we could send money. Wouldn’t that be foolish!

– There was Jeff Fairhall, a natural foods entrepreneur in Seattle, with whom Paul and I had correspondence about spiritual matters, which he scoffed at and later told Kerri Hartman Paul was schizophrenic. We later found out Jeff died at the age of 49 from a brain tumor. It turned out he became schizophrenic!

This was not the first or last time I would see Paul vindicated by the Lord against his mockers and accusers.

Who says there is no God?

The Path of Truth:

– Carol Browne of South Africa was exposed as a phony, hiding the fact that she went back to her unbelieving daughter and her new grandson, though her daughter rejected her counsel.

– Joyce Wentworth of New Mexico/Guatemala came on the scene in February, through her daughter Cherie finding The Path of Truth, and by the end of the year, Joyce came into sight of her crossroads. We all have them.

Work began this year for posting my songs in their raw form.

We wrote articles and posted a large section on an important topic: False Love.

I began writing proverbs, quite unexpected!

Paul wrote an excellent paper, “Jesus Christ, Almighty God,” in response to Kenneth Leckey‘s writing “Behold the Man!”.

After years of waiting and heart-searching, a False Teachers section goes up at TPOT.

Prophecies came from Marilyn for each person in March 2007 – “A year from now (or from now on) this table will be very different.”

There was the Drumheller trip with the episode at the creation museum and three Muslim fellows at the HH store – our first veiled threat from Muslims. Paul had an answer for the three of them. He said, “You say God has no Son.” I don’t recall how much more he said if any, but they fled the store crying, “Allahu Akbar!” It was bizarre. Truth truly does hurt, doesn’t it?

Lois had these words of prophecy for me: “Because you have been willing to draw the sword, the sword will not be drawn on you.”

I received another emotional/spiritual healing, relieved of the fear of having to rise early in the morning.

Editor’s Note, 2021: I had this fear since childhood, and once healed, the fear never returned.

Paul and Victor discussed doing the CHAI (Cohen-Hafichuk Authoritative Interpretation) of the New Testament.

On Sabbath, November 10th I received the words about Israel:

“Israel is about to be circumcised, and the Mosque of Omar will be cast away.” (It seems I was thinking of the Golden Dome.)

That’s the review of 2007. Now to:

2008

Particle – A Birth Announcement

On Tuesday, January 1, 2008, Trevor and Ingrid announced she is expecting. While Trevor and the women, particularly Ingrid, Lois, and Marilyn are excited, I’m not. Why, I don’t know. It could be a common reaction of indifference for a man, a selfish thing with me, or perhaps I’m spiritually not expecting any good to come of it.

I’m not “unexcited,” reluctant, or sorry. Children are to be expected with marriage, and if the Lord gives children to us (speaking as a community), I would hope it would be a good thing, with new dimensions added to our lives. Still, I’m not at all celebratory about it.

Particle – No Resolution Here

I begin 2008 being bothered with my weight, as usual, which I continually fail to regulate. Marilyn keeps producing delectables I enjoy, like lemon butter, cooked wheat and poppy seed, cookies, brownies, pancakes, nalysnyky (Ukrainian pancake and cottage cheese rolls baked in cream), and buttered popcorn, besides our having the goodies from the store like the maple syrup-coated cashews, eggnog, ice cream, Brazil nuts, roasted almonds, chocolates, etc. I simply enjoy food – anything but parsnips.

I have said it many times: Given the problems I have had with weight, it is a miracle that I’m only 25 lb. overweight at age 62, with all this food I love around me all the time and the sedentary computer occupation I’ve had for many hours a day every day of the week for years.

Particle – A Violent Reaction

In posting a letter to Erin Hafichuk on our site, I suggested we deliver a copy to Nathan Hafichuk’s home in Coaldale, so Trevor did so. On January 2nd, at about 11 PM, Nathan called, terribly angry, demanding that none of us ever sets foot on his property. Strangely enough, he did allow for correspondence by official mail. I decided to write him a letter:

“Hi, Nathan, Victor here,

The last time I saw you (that I can remember) was in 1997. You and Chris left in February of 1998 – about 10 years ago.

I don’t know what Chris, your parents, Erin, or anyone else has told you about us, but it shouldn’t matter. It also shouldn’t matter what others have done or are perceived to have done to you or me. This should be between you and me, insofar as the facts you and I know to be true. If we want to do anything useful or substantial, we can’t deal in rumors, gossip, speculations, opinions, preferences, wishes, perceptions, emotions, or any other such things. We must deal with facts.

“Why should I bother?” you ask. “You stick to your business, and stay out of my life, especially off my property, okay?” you say. You were truly angry and rude when you called me at 11 PM Wednesday. I remember your rage with Mr. Zanoni Sr. and others, and I have heard of several other such episodes. I think that is why you should hear me out.

Nathan, if you don’t like what happened to you, then you need to come to terms with it and get the victory; otherwise, you’ll continue in misery as you are, and pass it on to your family and all those with whom you have to do (they have it even now). And it can only get worse. Your anger could easily lead to great damage, even murder. That is why Jesus warned of anger, saying those guilty of anger and unjustified hatred are already guilty of murder. Think about it, seriously.

So, we should talk. Why do I want to talk? I’m not angry like you. I’m at peace, Nathan. I wasn’t at peace when you knew me. I, too, was constantly in turmoil, angry, and frustrated, but that changed in the year 2000. Starting in 1973, after 27 years of seeking after the Lord and “laboring to enter rest” (a spiritual state), as the Bible puts it, I finally entered what every person longs for – believer or otherwise (you included), and I’ve been there ever since.

Now, I would like everyone else to have that blessing as well. That is my sole ambition, put in me by the Lord, Who first wills it for all. To accomplish this goal is why He laid down His life.

For a time, as you may know, I was stripped of everything, Nathan… the farm, my possessions, wife, dignity, authority, friends, and son – all were taken from me. Then, in God’s preferred time, with the spiritual victory in 2000, which came when I began thanking God for my circumstances (as they were, and not as I preferred them), everything was returned to me. Things changed for me and everyone else with me.

Sean was sent packing and I told Marilyn that if she wanted to go with him, she was free to do so, but he wasn’t going to be here anymore, and neither was anyone who sided with him in any way. I understand you were extremely upset with him; however, even though he was wrong, so were you in your reaction.

From September 1996 to February 2000 (three and a half years), I had to submit to the humiliation and spiritual/psychological/social beating to overcome. That is something you know nothing about; very few people do. I asked you and Chris to submit to the whole situation, to Marilyn, Sean, Lois – everything, but you two knew better; you fretted, rebelled, and finally decided to pack it in, without notifying anyone, leaving us all high and dry.

I was angry. I felt betrayed by you two. But it turned out to be good, far better than it was; it was the Lord’s doing. Now it gets better and better, both within and without.

I apologize to you, Nathan, for all the wrongs committed against you; please believe me. I wish you could find it in God’s grace and strength to forgive me. I most certainly have forgiven you, your whole family, and everyone else. We all have been not only victims but also perpetrators. Unless we forgive others for their offenses against us, we can’t ever be forgiven for our offenses against any. It is a Law of God that is irrevocable and immutable (never to be withdrawn or changed).

I’m not writing to bring up your wrongs (I don’t care about those) but I want you to at least consider that you’re not innocent, and never were. You will recall the lies you told us, the stealing you did from the store(s), the things you did with other children, which neighbors reported to us – the list can go on, all these things despite our teaching and warnings.

What were we to do? Spanking wasn’t going to solve the problem, yet it seemed things were getting progressively worse. We prayed to God to ask Him to guide us and the only thing we received was that you were to be set apart in your home, even as one would go to jail for such crimes, except that obviously, you had many privileges regular inmates would never have.

How that arrangement was exercised by your parents, for the most part, I don’t know, and it doesn’t matter. We were afraid that if we didn’t act, something serious was going to happen to you; things have a way of developing and progressing in the directions they take. Your father also had a confirming vision from God for our action on your behalf.

Here at the farm, I tried to get everyone to get but a glimpse of where God wanted to take us, of what was held in store if we would only believe, submit, commit ourselves, and have patience. You and Chris couldn’t see it; it wasn’t given to you. Those who could stick it out without complaining or murmuring or wanting to be the important ones made it; those who chose otherwise didn’t. Ultimately, God chose whom He would, and gave them the grace to come through.

God put us through very necessary fires, Nathan. There was a lot of crap to be burned off; God knew, and not only He but others, too. Now, of those who made it, God requires that we proclaim the Good News of His power and glory.

Call us a cult, hate us if you will, live in the past, and continue to nurse your bitterness and hatred, but I believe you know deep down that it will get you nowhere, and you will hurt many, not only yourself, if you continue, with no reward whatsoever for it.

I don’t want to see that happen to you, your family, or anyone else. I want you to live, to be fulfilled, and even overjoyed in life, having forgiven everyone – me, your parents, siblings, Marilyn, Lois, Sean… everyone. We have gladly forgiven you. Only true forgiveness will win the day. Your father never learned that and see his misery. A prophet, Don Morrison, spoke by the Lord to Archie in 1976 saying he held unforgiveness, which was and is killing him.

You should know that money, family, occupational success, sports, fame, entertainment, wife, women, drugs, or anything else will not give you longed-for fulfillment or peace. Many know it, having found out the hard way, and all will learn it sooner or later.

By God’s grace only, I forgave Marilyn for her betrayal and Sean for his wickedness against us all. After six years, Paul and I were led by the Lord to receive Sean back. He returned, somewhat grudgingly accepting the “bottom of the totem pole,” here, and that is the way it will be while he’s here unless he is given more grace from God. There will never again be anything like what there was between Sean and Marilyn (or anyone else) while I’m around.

Marilyn’s prophecy of the Lord “taking” me was fulfilled on November 10, 1998, 777 days from the time those words were spoken on September 24, 1996, about nine months after you and Chris left. She had expected me to die physically. The prophecy was not wrong; her interpretation was, her motive was, and the part of marrying Sean was from Satan.

The Lord revealed to me that Satan had come and sown tares amid the wheat that was in the field of her mind. Those tares caused no end of trouble, but still served their purpose of sifting, for which we’re very thankful, all praise and glory and credit to God. Truly, we couldn’t have done without that process.

Now, everyone knows his or her place here and is cooperating fully, gladly working in harmony. Others have come as well. Some live on the farm; some don’t.

Does this mean that I want you to come and join us or live on the farm? No, not at all. I only want you to know God’s peace, live for Him, and have that fulfillment that can’t be had without Him.

Don’t let me stand in the way, Nathan. I’m not worth it; nothing is. I hope we can talk someday and that I can be of service to you, according to the will of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.

Victor”

I never received a reply from Nathan.

Particle – Jonathan Returns Lukewarm and Divided

Jonathan seemed rather lukewarm toward us when he returned home after 16 days away with Samantha and her family in Edmonton and Barrhead. This disappointed and unsettled me, so I had a talk with him. I felt I needed to be honest about my feelings.

I considered that I couldn’t blame him for his lack of desire or appreciation for being around us, given that children don’t necessarily have that same interest or passion for parents as parents do for children, and considering the raging battles between his mother and me all these years since 1995. What child in its right mind would want to have anything at all to do with such an environment?

I felt bad, had a good cry, and couldn’t eat, but concluded that I needed to accept things as they were. With my honesty, he hugged me to try to comfort me, seeing my pain, not that he felt anything that I can tell – and likely he shouldn’t. He said not a word, except, matter-of-factly, that he needed to go dry dishes. At least there is that honesty and obedience.

Why do I feel this way? Is it wrong? Is it selfish? Is it a carnal connection or idolatry of sorts? Am I lacking an unconditional love that doesn’t get hurt or offended and that doesn’t expect reciprocation? I asked Jonathan why he hugged me. He said he felt bad.

It later occurred to me to give thanks to God for all this, and then it came to me that as Jonathan has had that disconnect with me, so have I had it all my life, albeit in progressively lessening degrees, with my Father in Heaven. And He has been hurting with me just as I have been hurting with Jonathan.

I’m resolved above all things to see that pain entirely removed from the Lord’s heart where I’m concerned. And, if possible, granted that opportunity and greatest of privileges, I would like to remove that pain in Him concerning any other person as well – all this, of course, by His grace. I want Him to have all that can be had, not a micro-crumb missing.

Editor’s Note, JULY 2021: Ensuing years would gradually answer the cry of my heart and then some.

Particle – As Judging, So Judged

On Monday, January 7th, 2008, Paul found a posting that Jeff Fairhall had died of brain cancer on September 5, 2007 (See Particle – Another Fearful Judgment). We had had extensive correspondence with him. He had categorized Paul as a schizophrenic and said vile things about the Lord and us. He became a “clinically diagnosed” schizophrenic himself soon after, filled with conspiracy theories, calling himself, “The Messenger.”

This was a devil at work, deluding him.

I’ve seen a few times where people who attacked Paul were soon judged by the Lord.

Particle – The Victory of the Jews through Suffering

I finished reading Golda Meir’s autobiography. It was interesting. Perhaps it is understandable she and other Jews would desperately wish for anything impossible, magical, or unrealistic, but she seemed quite naïve about various Gentile persons and organizations or nations, particularly the Pope and the Roman Catholic Church. So often it seems the Jews hope for blood from a stone.

This too is understandable, considering that blessing, security, and peace in certain respects have been withheld from the Jews and the whole world has been at enmity with them for millennia.

Yet, You, Lord, have kept them for Yourself and will keep them. And when murderous Arabs, Muslims, people like Hitler, Saddam Hussein, Khadafy, Yasser Arafat, Mahmoud Abbas, Osama Bin Laden, and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad cry for their blood and threaten their destruction, these will all fall as they wished the Jews to fall, though they seem to have the temporary opportunity of inflicting pain and sorrow on their intended victims.

One day very soon, historically speaking, things will change, and nations will come on bended knees in honor and respect toward those God has chosen to bring knowledge of Him and peace to the entire world.

All this will be by the will and power of the Messiah, Whom the Jews have rejected for 2000 years and even all the centuries before He came in His flesh. They will finally know, love, worship, and serve Him to His glory. This development among nations serves as an allegory and speaks of the individual believer’s spiritual pilgrimage and destiny as well.

Particle – Denture Indenture

Who is indentured to whom here? Is the dentist our servant, whom we pay, or are we his servants by the vast amounts we pay?

Between all the people in our group, including Marilyn, Jonathan, and me, our dental bills are so far about $100,000 and continuing. Praise and thank God we have been able to afford it! I wonder how so many people get along without the proper care. While healthcare covers so many less important, even illegitimate, areas, it ought to be helping people pay for dental.

We have found dental care to be especially important and researchers are finding and proving our teeth to be a significant factor in general health and well-being. The Bible treats teeth as important:

“And if any injury occurs, then you shall give life for life, eye for an eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot” (Exodus 21:23-24 MKJV).

Canadian Medicare treatment covers eyes, ears, nose, throat, bones, all body systems, organs, glands, skin, hands, and feet, but not teeth?

Here’s why. I find our calendar records splattered with visits to the dentist for Jonathan, Marilyn, those at the farm, and me. We have spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on dental work over the years – an enormous expenditure. Yes, it’s nice to have good dentistry and be able to enjoy this privilege many haven’t been fortunate to have. And I can’t complain about the Lord providing for these expenses. Many can’t afford it. But must it be so expensive?

Edit, August 2022: In time, the Lord would answer that question.

Particle – Autobiography – To Sell or Give Freely?

While we’ve made available our writings and internet services free of charge, we have considered charging for the Theo-autobiography. Why? Because we have thought of doing hardcopy, a great expense.

Particle – Friction with Marilyn

I find constant fretting and opposition from Marilyn. It’s always there. She will often wrongfully contradict while I speak to others or she will bring in irrelevant, “corrective” or “qualifying” detail that only interrupts or takes away from the substance needlessly. If I tell her so, she’s resentful, defensive, disagreeable, and even pities herself – very childish at times.

Yet, after our last battle and my great anger, I seem at peace about letting her fight and not let it bother me the same way. I also expect that the Lord will deal with her. Can there be any other hope?

Particle – Prophetic Correction for Marilyn

On this morning of January 21st, 2008, I was given to tell Marilyn she needed to embrace criticism as a friend and not treat it as an enemy. If critics are found to be wrong, they will be shamed, and Marilyn will be exonerated. If the criticism is justified, she’ll gain and advance. She can’t lose, except by a wrongful attitude and reaction.

If she resists, she’ll harm herself and make it Hell for everyone else. I’ve lived with her Hellish defensiveness all our lives and I will not accept it anymore; I can’t. Either she sets herself to accepting criticism or I will spend all my time, attention, and effort elsewhere. I will waste no more time on strife.

These past several years, I’ve withdrawn myself from her to go on with life and duty. She has taken this itself as criticism and has bitterly rejected it. She needs to know it isn’t about her. I told her that refusing to accept criticism was wicked, even diabolical. She didn’t resist as I said these things and I could see for the first time that she wasn’t resisting.

Lord, do Your pleasure.

What I received and spoke to her agrees with what she says she was told she needed to do, that being to speak what she was given. She has feared to do so because of criticism, and so she must face her fear. Years ago, I told her she refused to be wrong, not acknowledging that we are by nature, in wrongness. While she has paid lip service to the theory, she has failed to acknowledge herself as a sinner.

Particle – UPSet with UPS

We sent out a device to a customer in Edmonton and insured it for the retail value. The driver, finding nobody home at the point of delivery, foolishly dropped it off on a doorstep. Allegedly, the customer never saw it, and someone stole it. Despite the ineptitude on the part of UPS, and though we had insurance, we were forced to strive with UPS for weeks before they agreed to pay.

But here’s “the kicker”: they would only pay the wholesale value, seeing we were a business and therefore presumably didn’t lose the full retail value of the goods shipped. Somewhat understandable, but why weren’t we advised accordingly by a written policy?

Why did they charge us for the retail value amount of insurance? Most people might have accepted what UPS had consented to pay, but after all the trouble it took us to get that far, we weren’t satisfied.

Paul finally found a way to get through to the UPS decision-makers, who, until then, were inaccessible. We were determined to take them to court if necessary and expose their tactics. We concluded they were abusing all their business clients who lost insured goods. It was fraudulent to charge insurance for the retail value and refuse to pay the same value when the goods were lost. Reaching an executive by phone, we finally got what was coming to us.

Win some, lose some. Not sure how much we won after hours of strife!

We are finding that our business is not just here to make money or sell organic food and health products; we’re here to confront people, companies, and businesses who lack decency, ethics, and morals in their dealings. While others walk away defeated and abused, we’re reluctant to do so, even though I let that happen with Computer Trends, which I have regretted, except for the fact that I deserved it (see Particle – “Man’s Insurance a Theft Device”).

Particle – Dream – James Sorochan – Strong Man Smashing Pillars

James called again to tell us of a dream he had two nights ago, Feb. 1/2 of 2008. He saw a great and strong man (like a caveman) stand before a building with an awning roof supported by two pillars. The man was about 10 feet tall and had a great club. He swung the club at one of the pillars. It cut a swath the thickness of the club but did not collapse the pillar. The upper part of the severed pillar then sank to join the lower part. There was dust from the impact. END

The interpretation I had was that the building, which James seemed to feel was something like a restaurant in a city (like Lethbridge, he said), was the collective religious establishment upon the two pillars of false love and false doctrine, mimicking, or purporting to be truth and love.

My letter to Todd Atkinson, pastor at the River of Life Church in Lethbridge, was one swipe at one pillar and the letter Paul is about to write will strike the other pillar. I told James I was that man but the Truth is also that man, in all its “rawness” and unpretentiousness, demolishing the pillars of false religion. To the establishment, we are crude, yet powerful.

James was reminded of this dream by the words Todd spoke of us in his letter to James’ brother Donny Sorochan (which James found on the company computer): “…and Scripture is a club to beat people with.” Really? And how about “My Word being like fire, or as a hammer that breaks rock to pieces”?

When the Word comes against the guilty and willingly ignorant, they’re offended. It’s “natural.”

Editor’s Note, April 27, 2022: I have another interpretation of James’ dream, which, if I’m right, will be revealed in years to come.

Particle – Words to the Sanhedrin

On February 4th, 2008, Paul and I each wrote a letter to Rabbi A. Even-Yisrael Steinsaltz of The Sanhedrin, Dr. Gadi Eshel of The New Jewish Congress, and Rabbi Chaim Richman of “The Holy Temple and Temple Mount Movements.”

I never dreamed of a day I’d be speaking by the Spirit of God to the Sanhedrin. Only this time, we will not be like Stephen who was stoned by the Sanhedrin, or Abel whom religious Cain killed. Now, we will be like Samuel with Agag, David with Goliath, and Elijah with the 450 prophets of Baal.

Particle – Grander Less Grand Now

We are having conflict with Kate Taylor and WRL, the Grander Technology distributors for the Western Hemisphere, but it seems there’s nothing we can do. We believe they are pursuing an agenda with policies and procedures that will not work but they will not listen to what we have to say. They also insist on our signing a contract which we cannot sign in good faith.

Editor’s Note, April 27, 2022: It turned out God had other plans that would benefit WRL and us, for which we can be thankful.

Particle – Another Miscarriage

On the Sabbath, February 9, 2008, Ingrid suffered a miscarriage. She was taken to the hospital but was okay. She feels better, her body having expelled its undesirable contents.

We had a conference call and discovered that Trevor has been vaunting himself over Mark and Mariko about their not having children while Ingrid was pregnant, even utilizing critical comments of unbelievers against them.

I was angry and sharply rebuked Trevor. Then came this proverb: “He who loves himself despises everyone else.” All agreed with me. Indeed, Sara and Paul brought to light other things of which I was unaware concerning Trevor and his attitude.

Lord, what do we do with Trevor? So many times have we asked.

Ingrid informed me Trevor was sulking and wouldn’t so much as speak to her all day, walking right past her. He accused her of things he was guilty of. I deal with incorrigible brats.

Particle – An Egregious Institution

We did an internet investigation of Laurie Andreachuk, Rev. Stephen Boisson of Red Deer, Mark Steyn, who wrote for Maclean’s Magazine, and Ezra Levant, owner of The Western Standard. Ezra is fighting the Human Rights Commission (HRC), which is a lawless concoction some blithering fools have come up with to allow the victory of judgment to those who least deserve it, with the taxpayer footing the bill and the complainant having nothing to lose.

Muslims and homosexuals, among others, are having a heyday with this instrument to promote their agendas at the taxpayers’ expense and especially that of the defendants. Prime Minister Harper once called it an “egregious” system.

Lord, Your will, please!!!

Particle – A King of Killers

We have been discussing Reformer John Calvin and Servetus, the Christian whom Calvin had tortured to death by slow burning at a stake. Calvin was an egotistic, legalistic, cruel, petty tyrant, thoroughly antiChrist in spirit.

While reformers adore Calvin, they ought to deplore him. He was satanically inspired, and I don’t mind saying so. What he did to Servetus, as one murderous example of many, was unconscionable. His doctrine, too, is abominable. He was no different whatsoever in word and spirit than the Roman Church and its highest prelate who not only calls himself, “Father,” contrary to the Lord’s admonition but “Most Holy Father.” “Father” isn’t good enough for that boy. Calvin coveted and demanded every bit as much esteem and obeisance.

Editor’s Note – See: https://www.thepathoftruth.com/false-teachers/john-calvin.htm and other articles on John Calvin.

Particle – Growing Pains in Fighting Fears

On Sunday, February 17, 2008, I woke up with doubts and fears about the new building project, thinking it is my silly dream. The only one speaking a prophetic word on it was Marilyn saying, “It is a door to the world.”

Marilyn also declared that the store must be moved and included in the new building because not doing so would be like leaving our store in the old workshop, where it was when we first bought the farm. That was not good! I believe her.

I called a conference, we discussed my fears, and they were allayed. Not only do we proceed with the building, but we proceed to enjoy the process, knowing the Lord will take care of all the details. I have asked the Lord that I would enjoy rather than fear this project, unlike the way I have been with everything else in my miserable life.

Particle – A Word on Cody

When we heard that Cody was getting married again, the question I was about to ask was, “Does she have any idea what she’s getting herself into?” Before I could verbalize it, these words were out: “Does he have any idea what he’s getting himself into?”

We would come to know the significance of those words. In time, on Tuesday, February 19th, 2009, Dena discovered that Cody married Tonya Cole Lightfoot in Hawaii.

Particle – Revelation on 1976 Log Cabin Visitation

Last night, I had a wonderful revelation or at least a reminder. Why did the Lord speak to me in that little old cabin filled with junk that children had used to play? It is because that is what the religious people and church systems are all about today. They have religious garbage and are left with only relics of things that once may have been useful and good, or not. We are living in the final age of children playing with garbage leftovers. Very true.

Searching for some shelter from stormy, freezing winter weather to relieve myself (our house plumbing was frozen), I defecated in the remains of a log cabin, appropriately so. I have had to be brought out of the religious works and systems of men and purged of them. The Lord has told me to leave it all behind as I would my dung. The apostle Paul said and did the same:

Philippians 3:7-11 MKJV
(7) But whatever things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ.
(8) But no, rather, I also count all things to be loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them to be dung, so that I may win Christ
(9) and be found in Him; not having my own righteousness, which is of the Law, but through the faith of Christ, the righteousness of God by faith,
(10) that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being made conformable to His death;
(11) if by any means I might attain to the resurrection of the dead.

Particle – Combat with Calvin

On February 21st, 2008, we were ready to send out Harvest Haven Herald #14. I decided that we must speak against Calvinism no matter how many Reformed customers we have, and those are not a few. Marilyn warned (not in disagreement) that if we publish the Harvest Haven Herald, calling Calvin “murderous,” we would be losing Reformed customers. I agreed.

In the night, the Lord quickened these thoughts to me: “Which do you choose? To please men in destruction and destroying, for your profit, or to stand with the Lord in His hurt for those people who are being destroyed? What about those among the Reformed people who might be questioning their doctrine and religious practices? Are they even aware that the Calvin they revere was not a believer in Christ, but a ruthless murderer of saints?

“Will you keep silent for the perpetrators, or will you speak up for the victims? Will you save your life or lose it for the Lord’s sake and that of those seeking Truth, for whom the Lord hurts?”

And did the Lord not say, “You take care of My affairs and I will take care of yours”?

And did I not receive the words from Delores, saying, God is ready to assume full responsibility for the one wholly committed to Him”?

Has He not rewarded and kept me in every instant of obedience and sacrifice to Him? Has He not reminded me repeatedly of these words: “He that keeps his life shall lose it and he that loses it shall find it”?

Case closed. We speak; yea, we shout from the housetops!

Particle – Dr. Noji Prophecy Fulfilled

James Sorochan told us about Dr. Janice Noji. He had been taking treatments there and related to us how her focus and interest were no longer in her chiropractic practice but in wining and dining. I had prophesied that she would lose what she had (See Particle -Prophecy to Dr. Janice Noji). Who knew James would come along with this report? Who could guess her business would fade in such a manner?

Who says there is no God?

Particle – Jonathan Persists and Prevails

Jonathan and I have been playing ping pong rather regularly for the past weeks. He is improving so that he has beaten me in a few games now. At first, he was rather discouraged because he could barely score a point, and I wasn’t about to pretend he was winning. He had to work and improve. Now he has the fruits of his patience and determination. Patience and persistence bring reward and victory.

Particle – A Word Concerning Paula Baker-Laporte

On February 27 and 28, we met with Paula Baker-Laporte, part owner of EcoNest from New Mexico. We hired her as an architect to design our planned building.

We also spoke to Paula about spiritual matters and shared with her the words Marilyn received on the building, “Door to the World.” I also shared what I received of Paula as we visited, which was that we were to consider her as the first of those to whom Marilyn’s words applied.

At the time Marilyn received the words on the building, she also received and said that “the building would be a work on us.” There was no promise that Paula was the least interested and we weren’t hoping for any indications, contrary to what Paula seemed to think, but that’s God’s business.

Particle – Haste Makes Waste, and Carelessness Pennilessness

When James left his wife Leah after 20 years of marriage, he handed full responsibility to a female lawyer in Calgary he found in the Yellow Pages to represent his interests. His basic attitude was one of, “I don’t care; give her whatever she wants; I just want out.” His lawyer did give Leah whatever she wanted. It appeared that Leah’s lawyer diligently did his (or her) job and covered all loopholes, tying James to a formidable agreement, which, as an ox going to the slaughter, he signed.

We persuaded him to try to reason with Leah but all she could do was bitterly tell him she “got him good.” She was not about to change anything. James was hooked.

How foolish are those who act on emotions and feelings – how wasteful and destructive! And we’ve all been there countless times; I certainly have.

Particle – Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary

Dena caught Mary sneaking food a second time and lying about it (Ingrid caught her the first time). Mary asked if she could call me and confess, which she and Dena did. I asked Mary how many times she had sneaked things. “Twice,” she replied.

“So you were caught both times you stole?” I asked.

“Yes,” she replied.

I told her I found it hard to believe. “Are you telling us you only took stuff twice?”

“Well, maybe 3 or 4,” she said.

I finally got it out of her that she had taken stuff nearly every day. She started feeling sorry for herself. I asked her why she was lying to us and if she despised us so much as to do so. I asked her to promise not to do it again. She promised that if she did it again, she would leave. I said, “Okay,” and asked her to tell the others what she promised. She said she would, and she did.

I suspect Mary wanted to receive attention and correction from me as she witnessed others at the farm receiving. She has been starved for attention and direction. We understand that children need established boundaries, without which they’re insecure and lost as a ship out at sea without a rudder or sails. I did empathize with Mary. Been there with weight loss challenges all my life.

Particle – Canada Condemns Israel

I have recorded in my journal for March 2, 2008, that Canada condemned Israel’s attempts at self-defense against Hamas rockets being fired into Sderot and now Ashkelon, a city of 100,000 people. The UN Secretary-General also condemned Israel. I was disappointed and grieved by Canada’s stance.

I expected more of Stephen Harper. Could he not have done something? Was he fair-minded toward Israel or wasn’t he? I hate mixture. God hates mixture.

Particle – The Weight Problem Continues

I have spent all my life struggling with eating and being overweight. Today, March 5, 2008, I weigh 188 pounds (85.5 K) while 5-foot, 10 inches in height. I don’t have the heart to fight it anymore. I have also written The Perfect Diet, which makes me question myself even more.

My only consolation is that if anything has served to keep me from pride and arrogance, it has been my weight problem, which, thankfully, has not been nearly as bad as it could be. It has been far worse for many other poor souls. But I ask myself, “Where did I go wrong this time?” I can’t say I have a sure answer from the Lord. How can it be anything other than eating too much?

Particle – Domestic and Internal Conflicts

There is often a conflict of preferences and personalities in our home with me on the one side and Marilyn and Jonathan on the other. They defend and stand up for each other and I often can’t see that I’m in the wrong, though sometimes I know I am.

Am I a brute beast or has Marilyn spoiled and trained Jonathan to see things her way? I also find them rather impatient and contemptuous of me. Am I proud and “sensitive” or am I picking up a true attitude on their part?

I certainly see Marilyn as the source and inspiration for their attitude. I believe her innate hatred of me has been passed on to Jonathan, an unwitting and unintentional victim, yet formed into a perpetrator, nonetheless. He suffers her poison, continuing to pour it out to her hurt and his, and there’s nothing I can do but patiently suffer and wait on the Lord to deal with it. He will make known right and wrong and vindicate.

Reading my journal about Marilyn disturbs me and affects my attitude towards her. What happened was so unpleasant, and still can be so in my memory. It seems the best thing to do is to put it all away, yet I feel I need to include in this record the facts and reality of the conflict as experienced. It seems only right that I first conclude whether recording these things is right or wrong, yet I feel compelled to go ahead with it.

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