During a ten day fast, I contemplated the reality of the two natures which do battle within each believer. The Lord was teaching me that He is about reconciling and not utterly destroying the first Adam in us. Did He not provide skins for Adam and Eve? Did He not also provide him Abel and Seth and by Seth, the Messiah? And had Adam and Eve repented and confessed their sin? Not at all. They would not take blame but passed it where they could, even on God. But God planned the salvation of all men and will perform it perfectly. If this is not so, not one of us will be redeemed. It is all or nothing.
I look back at my life with regret and remorse
Because the carnal man has reigned on the throne, of course.
The spiritual man has been battered and bruised;
He has tried to fight but was often confused.
“This is my friend, partner and room-mate!
Why is it he fights me, so full of hate?
He said he agreed with all that I do
And believed the Lord to be entirely true!
What’s this? I find him my enemy!
What he really is, now I’m given to see.
To defeat his cause, the Lord will help me
And only then will we both be free.
He’ll be put in his place and raised from the dead
And the Lord, not he, will rule instead.
From now on, each other we won’t hate but adore,
Shouting in unison, ‘Let there be war no more’.”
Moon River Estates, Jan. 29, 1998
In my striving to be conscious of God and to hear His voice and walk with Him, I slowly learned that I do not get the Lord to speak simply by striving to listen. Nor is He always speaking and I hear or get to hear bits and pieces only as I succeed in efforts to “tune in” like a ham operator trying to pick up a frequency. No, the Lord speaks when it pleases Him, and when He speaks, He is fully capable of making Himself heard with or without any help or hindrance from us. Until we are humbled and repent of our arrogance, we will neither understand nor rest. Standing atop a mountain peak, I could not hear a sound. In vain I strained my ears to hear But nothing came except a tear Because I could not hear. Cold it grew and I withdrew To lower levels not by choice, And there I felt more comforted But silence remained the only voice And still I could not hear. “Am I dead?” in pain I asked myself, “Is there something wrong with me? I should think that on these wondrous heights Is where hearing and seeing ought to be.” And down I came again. Lower and lower and lower still, Not even ground level was to be my fill, But lower and lower and lower ’til The darkness smothered me out of sight And my only friends were sorrow and fright. But I was not alone. For in the nether of darkness and tether, Down where I had made my bed, And where I resigned to live and sleep, I heard the Voice instead: “Come up!” It said, “and into th...
"Lord, who has believed our report?" cried Isaiah. It is to the sinner a prophet is sent, but sinners do not see nor hear by virtue (or vice) of the fact that they are sinners. The carnal man cannot receive the things of the Spirit. And because they are sinners, they are the ones who need to hear! So then both prophet and perpetrator, both saint and sinner, both herald and hearer learn of the grace of God, without Whom is nothing possible. "Therefore He has mercy on whom He wills, and whom He wills He hardens." Nobody believes me; They wince when I speak; I give them Scriptures; They give me notions. They profess to love the Lord to honor the Scriptures to walk in righteousness and truth; They have their own bibles Of bits and pieces Tailored to their doctrines To suit their purposes. They hate the Light; They love their gods And their sins. God is anathema to them As He is So they change the glory of God, They take His Name, Giving it to gods of their own liking; They take His words, Wresting them to their destructions With smiling public faces They deceive themselves, saying, "We suffer for His sake; Our reward is stored up For which we have so labored." Paupers, laid in the dust, Naked, diseased, deranged, Babbling vain repetitions, Bled bone dry By the gods they serve, While I remain wealthy and healthy And alone. Moon River, Oct. 31, 1991
The terrible battle to be fought by the seeker of God is against unbelief. One moment, we can be so full of belief, of joy and excitement, assurance and boldness. Then, as little as it takes to slam a door, so quickly and surely have saints of God known the onslaught of unbelief in all its terrible power. Our fight is the fight of faith. Our faith is the victory. Nor is it a faith concocted, a matter of will power. It is rather, a surrender to God, an acceptance of things as they are, an acknowledgment of things as they are and entrusting them entirely out of our control to His. Thus we come out of our valleys, our clouds of darkness and into the light. Wave after wave, Billow after billow, No rest, no peace, except for a time, A short time, a breather so to speak, From the unrelenting pressures which increase. Darkness all around us, Blind alleys at every turn, Clouds obscure the light of day And leave us damp and cold. When will we be free? When will the storm cease? Has it no end? Has it no bounds? Can we go on with our hopes Dashed to pieces at every turn, Like cardboard huts in a hurricane? Is it sin in our lives that causes this state? Is the wrath of God kindled against us? Have we no hope, no reason to expect An end to intermittent turmoil? “There is no peace to the wicked,” the Scriptures say, Yet we have searched and searched ourselves again. And though we know that in our flesh dwells no good thing, We still find ourselves without an answer....