Desperately Wicked

[Cassidy King]

I want to give thanks to the Lord for this morning's Bible Reading. Also I would like to draw attention to something Martin spoke by the Lord. He called out the statement I made before I said I had forsaken my grandmother. The statement I made was "I'm not a mean or terrible person or anything.". Martin's point was that I was deceived in saying that. Thank you Lord for directing Martin's words! What an important thing to remember! No matter how far I think the Lord has brought me from where I started with Him just 2 months ago, how deceived would I be to ACTUALLY think I am not a wretched, mean, deceitful, lazy, and downright rebellious being!
The Lord has blessed me today with remembering how utterly depraved I am. He has reminded me that without Him and ONLY Him I am completely in bondage to sin. How merciful has He been to strip me of the notion of free will? I am either a slave to sin or a slave to the Lord Jesus Christ. I have called Him Lord before when in reality sin and satan have been my lord. Slowly but surely He is taking that place in my heart, removing those stains, pouring living water where only dryness and decay existed. How can I call Him Lord but by the Spirit? My thoughts and my will wage war against His, daily. My unbelief, which typically appears as fear, calls His power and sovereignty into question. He has proven Himself to be truly Lord of All and my heart is desperately wicked to falter from trusting Him for but a moment. But then, He give the measure of faith, tests it, purifies it, rewards for our use of it, forgives where we fall and repent, and in the end reconciles ALL to Himself. Look how desperately wicked I am, and how good the Lord Jesus Christ is, that He would give all manner of good things to a leper.